Before Babel & other stories available for less than £5
BEFORE BABEL
"Listen," the old man said, "I'll tell you how it happened." She had heard his monologue countless times and started to doze within minutes. But he continued unconcerned. "I had made a lot of money on the first Universal Decoders. They had all the languages programmed in and could quickly translate between any of them. My shop stocked U.D.1s in all shapes and sizes: but I was the first to catch on to the fashion of having them slung around the neck. We attached cords in the stockroom and marked up the price. It was not only tourists - anyone bought them. For young people they were a badge of adulthood; for older people a sign of youth." He sighed nostalgically.
"It was the U.D.2s that turned everything upside down. They were revolutionary machines applying Artificial Intelligence" he spat out these words with contempt "to Universal Decoding. The machines were networked to each other, and their signals boosted by U.D. relay stations. They learnt any new language and translated it into anything you could want. Everyone wanted one so, of course, we sold them. Within a week of our first sale, the first reports of conversations with pets came in. People went wild, hanging U.D.2s around the necks of any animals. The trouble began when pet owners heard what their pets really thought of them. The resentment felt by the animals, magnified by years of captive dependency, horrified the fawning owners. Many threw their animals out on the street, regarding them as ungrateful recipients of their love and affection. The animals, U.D.2s slung around them, could speak to any other animal with a decoder. Cats and dogs allied with horses and bulls. A group of activists banded up with the animals. My brother was one: they called themselves the Yudis. "No cruelty to creatures" they used to shout as they ran amok, liberating pets, destroying abattoirs, sawing through the bars at zoos. When the Republican Guard had to be called in to restore order, they were attacked by flocks of birds no one ever discovered how they got networked in. The yudis were distributing U.D.2s to anything that made a sound: I had a good line in waterproofed versions for fish and aquatic mammals. But it was the dog-packs that turned everything sour for the yudis."
"A number of the packs were so wild that the more articulate canine leaders had no control over them. These packs attacked anyone; and many yudis died as they ran beside them only to find themselves the next victims. The government seemed unsure what to do; but it was Isaac Babel who decided for them. He had always been a rabble-rouser, and this was a cause he could not fail to espouse. He called on his followers to destroy the relay stations. My brother died defending the Central Relay Station against the Babellers. But the stations were blown up, with the support of air force rockets eventually. Only then did the Republican Guard come in and take over."
He old man shook his head, sipped his drink, and thought for a while. Finally,
he went on. "I went bankrupt within a month. Universal Decoders were banned,
and I was stuck with the largest stock in the country. Huge numbers of animals
were shot, decoders still hanging around their necks. Pet ownership virtually
ceased. Most people became vegetarians. I'm telling you that you would not recognise
this city if I could take you back before Babel." The man looked over at his companion, but
she heard nothing. U.D.2 draped
carelessly around her neck; the Rottweiler slept.
